Best thing for you is to try it yourself to see what goes on. Most games have their own "community" and some are better than others. What I can tell you for sure is that you can't protect your kids from abusive language. Many games do act like a "chat room". TBH the thing that probably puts "older" gamers such as myself off is the proliferation of idiotic kids on Live. It's nothing they probably don't hear in the playground, but you should be aware that there is a lot of swearing and abuse going on.